Hanging over my head

I read a post this morning at Work it, Mom! which asked if stress could be good for you. The writer commented that she does her most productive work when she's under pressure.*

There's a lot of truth in this statement for me. I'm much more productive when I have a deadline and my stress level is higher. Having months to complete something with no real set deadline (deadlines I set for myself don't count because I can change those and I'm easy to manipulate by me) basically means it's not going to get done until I finally snap and want to shoot someone (usually myself).

This has been my problem with two of my projects right now. One is my CBTs - I hate CBTs. I'm much better as an in-class kind of learner. I learned a trick in high school from my awesome math instructor who told us that when we got to college the most important thing was to go to class. "I never studied," he said, "but I always went to class and paid attention." This was so true for me. I rarely did homework except for what was required, because I had so many other things to do (i.e. work so I could afford to go to college) and I still kept up my grade point average (3.65 ever semester but two, but there extenuating circumstances for those two).

My CBTs have been hanging over my head for the last year, well since November last year though I've been signed up for them since February 2007. I had also enrolled in another class last year that I had to finish by October 24 (which I did, on the last day of course) and so I didn't start these until November. Now I'm really on a deadline that I can't fudge anymore and so I'm spending oodles of time on them.

The bad thing is that this is now playing havoc with my other project: preparing for TCM. I have not been running enough and I'm rather fearful for three weeks from now. I believe I can finish, but my time will not be what I'd like it to be because my mind is not focused on this goal like I want it to be. And it's all my fault. I have relied too much on someone else to motivate me with running (i.e running partners that don't exist) and I have often set aside running for studying like I did today.

Today was the perfect day for running but did I go? Nope. I slept in (because I had to work this weekend and didn't get to any other day), went into work because I needed to finish some ordering and the project I'm working on as I cover for another section. I worked for three hours, came home and started studying again. I was going to take a break to go run, but realized if I did then I'd lose at least 90 minutes of studying if not more.

So I'm farther along in my one project which WILL be finished this week, but that doesn't do much good for my other project.

So my question - how can I better motivate myself with these goals I set for myself? I seem to set myself up for failure. Like TCM - I knew I didn't have a running partner this year and I knew I had a lot of travels that would take me away from my normal routine.

Maybe that's what I need - a better routine. I do really well with routines. Spontaneity is not my strong suit. Just ask my mother who bitches that she has to schedule, as she puts it, an "appointment" to spend time with me.

But I'm open to suggestions if anyone has some...

p.s. *I'm not a mom...I just thought the articles were good. :) I'm weird, I know.