19 April 2008

Letter 19a

I wrote Letter 19 earlier but I can't bring myself to publish it. Actually I did, but then I took it off because it's probably not good to publish. So those three of you who maybe read it, nevermind. It was just me wishing for things that will never happen. Story of my life.

I finished one of my blankets - a baby blanket for my mom's boss. Now I need to start the blanket I'm really excited to make: the one for my Goddaughter. I'm so excited for this one. I'm taking a little break from my PIF projects, though I have yarn for those too.

My day has been weird. It's beautiful here - picture perfect weather. And I had to drag my sorry ass out to go for a run this afternoon. I had run some errands this morning but I just wasn't feeling up to running today. But I made myself go out because if I didn't I'd feel guilty and pathetic for the rest of the weekend. I probably still will because I didn't run enough or well enough. My heart just wasn't in it. I'm not sure why. You'd think the sun would help. Maybe just too many things on my mind.

I'm watching Juno...right now she's asking if people can stay together forever and be happy. Her dad tells her to find someone who can love you for exactly who you are. I wonder if I'll ever find that person. I thought I did once, but despite my best efforts I screwed that one up. And since I haven't felt very confident about my abilities in relationships. I seem to mess them up quite well. Whatever, I guess.

No comments: