Coming Clean

I must have issues.

HA! Everyone reading this, all 3 of you, are saying, "No shit, Moe. We knew that."

But here's the latest in the land of Moe. We have a few bathrooms in the office building, as most office buildings do, and one of the main ones here has the best water pressure and hot water. In fact, there used to be a sign that said, "Caution: Hot Water". I love this bathroom. It's the place to go when your hands are cold (like today, or any day for that matter - it's always cold in here). But it also seems to be the place to go to rinse out your coffee mugs, and often these mugs are left in the bathroom for hours, sometimes days at a time.

Last week there was a nice company mug left in the bathroom. I secretly coveted it because I have a weakness for mugs - it's a blue, marble print, very pretty and big! - but I knew it not to be mine so I left it. Plus, let's get real here folks: EW! Ew, Ew, Ew! Who would want a mug that's been used, is still caked with coffee and has been sitting in a bathroom which everyone knows is riddled with germs, hot water or not. I'm so glad I left it and went back to using the pseudo-opposing company's mug instead, which was okay looking but not as big. I can handle it. Supposedly size doesn't matter and I'm all for equal opportunity and all that crap.

But one of my co-workers saw me using this other mug and started giving me a little bit of hell. I tried to explain that the only mug in my office I could use that would be associated with our company is almost 20 years old from when we were under another name and really should be preserved as a collector's item with all my other unused china in the office, not just used for hot cocoa. He offered up a company travel mugs, but I hate those and have thousands already, so he said he'd see what he could do.

Yesterday I came to work to find a dusty, but new and never used awesome mug like the one I had seen in the bathroom. He had given me it so I could at least promote our company and stop using the icky one. He had had his on display in his office but said I could have it! Suh-weet. I was so excited I had 2 cups of hot cocoa yesterday and 2 more today. Now I need to make him cookies as a thank you.

Here's where my issue begins. I know, stop laughing. At least I'm admitting them. Anyway, after my second cup today I went to the main bathroom and there was now a note: "Does anyone know what happened to the blue Company mug that was here?" The note wasn't there yesterday and so my paranoia immediately springs to the forefront. I know I didn't take it but there is the question of whether the person whose cup is missing is now thinking that I did take it because she saw me with mine this morning.

I refuse to get sucked into this game, but being in a building where you're either In or you're Out and I've been trying to ride the fence (doing well, so far, I think) having people think badly of me won't help the fence game. So I think, maybe I should go to the woman and say something like, "I hope you find your mug. Brian gave me one for me to use and I love it!" But then I feel like I'm just playing into them and maybe it's better to be on the outs just a little bit and let them think all their own horrible thoughts about me (stealer) because I know the truth and if they aren't man or woman enough to just ask me then screw 'em.

So that's what I'm going to do because we work in such a junior high already I don't want to go there. This is why I just stay in my office and work. It's not that I don't socialize but I'm not 'them' and this just works better for me. You can stop laughing now. I know this is idiotic but it's NaBloPoMo - what else am I going to write about?