06 June 2006

summer lament

In spite of the muggy, hot weather, it doesn’t quite feel like summer yet. Maybe it’s because I haven’t had much time to enjoy it. You’d think I would feel that it is summer since I had winter twice and completely skipped spring, but I just can’t wrap my mind around it yet.

Maybe it’s just that summer has lost the summer feeling. I know I graduated and have been a true adult for two whole years now, so maybe it’s just the not having classes ending and the freed feeling from school and responsibility that I miss. Instead, life just keeps rolling along, work projects continue, and the seasons change without my knowledge.

Granted, I see it happening. I have picture windows across from my desk, but not being able to say screw it to work, take a mental health day, leave it all behind and play makes it seem like it's just a slow motion picture, watching one of those time-delayed cameras they use to show how the trees or flowers blossom in science films.

I miss the excitement of planning day trips to the lake or park, the taking off in the middle of the afternoon for a run with no timeline of when I need to be back, the enjoyment of going in and out of buildings just for the rush of the A/C to heat to A/C moments. I miss summer.

4 comments:

jillian said...

so let's plan a day trip or a trip to the lake! it doesn't have to be in the middle of the day to be fun!!

~moe~ said...

Okay!

Chad K said...

GOsh, I think you are right about this and I think it is part of growing up--a part that I don't necessarily enjoy. It really makes you rely on your vacation time doesn't it? I wonder if it might make you spread out your vacation time more and take some Friday's off, etc...(or do you really get vacation with your job? Do you just take time when you need it? How does that all work for you?)

Well, here is to some adjusting...Paz

kendi said...

aha! i'm not the only one! i've been talking to gary about this lately, because things have seemed so wierd during the last few weeks. i need closure! i need to turn in final papers! i need to fill out evaluation forms and criticize the stuff i don't like! i need a complete change of pace!

actually, i don't, and i didn't like much of it at the time (especially at the end), but my body is used to certain routines, so it's hard to break the pattern. realizing it helped for me.

your other problem is that you live in a basement and work in a fishbowl. i try to spend as much time with the windows open as possible. i like it when the borders between outside and inside are liminal.

we'll get it figured out. it'll just take time.